SOME SIMPLE DISCIPLINES THAT WEREN’T TAUGHT IN SCHOOL, BUT CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE (Part 1)

Master These Three Fundamental Principles to Transform Your Life, Career, and Relationships—Starting Today

Let me be crystal clear from the outset: I’m a passionate advocate for formal education. The structure, discipline, and foundational knowledge that conventional schooling provides are invaluable. However—and this is crucial—our educational systems were never designed to be the sole architects of a successful, fulfilling life.

Think about it. School taught you algebra, history, and how to dissect a frog. But did it teach you how to manage your emotions during a crisis? How to perceive setbacks as stepping stones? How to balance self-confidence with genuine collaboration? These aren’t supplementary skills—they’re the very disciplines that separate those who merely survive from those who truly thrive.

As Jim Rohn wisely observed, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” The responsibility for holistic education—the kind that leads to total freedom and fulfillment—cannot rest solely on any institution. It must rest on you.

What follows are three simple yet profoundly transformative disciplines that weren’t part of any curriculum I encountered in school, but have revolutionized my life in ways I never imagined possible. These aren’t theoretical concepts—they’re practical, battle-tested principles that you can implement immediately.

Discipline #1: Major in the Majors, Not in the Minors

The Principle: Most of what stresses us out doesn’t actually matter.

Let that sink in for a moment. The majority of circumstances that trigger our anxiety, steal our sleep, and dominate our mental bandwidth are, in the grand scheme of things, inconsequential. We’ve become masters at emotional exaggeration, transforming molehills into mountains with alarming efficiency.

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: barring genuine tragedy or crisis, most of what we label as “emergencies” are merely brush fires that would extinguish themselves without intervention. Yet we respond as if our entire existence hangs in the balance.

The Rattlesnake Principle

Consider this sobering fact: most victims of rattlesnake bites don’t die from the venom itself. They die from their panicked response—running blindly, elevating their heart rate, making irrational decisions that lead to falls, accidents, or actions that accelerate the venom’s spread through their system.

The snake didn’t kill them. Their reaction did.

How often do we do the same in our daily lives? A critical email arrives, and we spiral into catastrophic thinking. A project hits a snag, and we abandon our strategic thinking for frantic firefighting. A relationship experiences tension, and we react from emotion rather than wisdom.

The Strategic Response

Tony Robbins teaches that “life is happening for you, not to you.” When you adopt this mindset, you shift from reactive panic to strategic response. Here’s how to major in the majors:

Pause and Assess: Before reacting, ask yourself: “On a scale of 1-10, where 10 is a genuine life-or-death situation, where does this actually rank?” Most issues will land between 2-5.
Identify the Real Issue: Strip away the emotional charge and identify the core problem. What specifically needs to be addressed?
Create a Strategic Action Plan: Rather than spiraling, channel that energy into solution-focused thinking. What are three concrete steps you can take right now?
Execute with Calm Confidence: Move forward deliberately, not desperately.

The majors in life—your health, your most important relationships, your core values, your long-term vision—deserve your focused attention and strategic energy. Everything else? That’s minor league. Don’t give minor issues major attention.

As Darren Hardy puts it in The Compound Effect, “You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” Make it a daily discipline to distinguish between what truly matters and what merely seems urgent.

Discipline #2: Understand the Power of Perception—Your Reality is Your Responsibility

The Principle: How you see your world determines how you experience your world.

Imagine ten people witnessing the same car accident. You’d get ten different accounts—not because the facts changed, but because perception is inherently personal. One person sees chaos and danger; another sees an opportunity to help. One sees confirmation that the world is falling apart; another sees a reminder to drive more carefully.

Your perception isn’t just how you see things—it’s the lens through which you create your reality.

The Perception-Action Loop

Here’s where it gets fascinating: your perception shapes your actions and responses, which in turn reshape your perception. It’s a continuous feedback loop that either elevates you or entraps you.

Bob Proctor taught that “thoughts become things.” But more accurately, persistent thoughts shaped by perception become your lived reality. If you perceive challenges as insurmountable obstacles, you’ll approach them tentatively, half-heartedly, already convinced of failure. That perception guarantees the outcome you feared.

Conversely, if you perceive the same challenges as robust opportunities for growth, innovation, and breakthrough—as Les Brown would say, “opportunities to prove what you’re made of”—you’ll approach them with entirely different energy, creativity, and persistence.

The Choice Before You

You stand at a crossroads every single day: Will you walk in hope and optimism, or will you drift among the masses convinced of failure before ever mounting an earnest, disciplined, calculated effort?

This isn’t about toxic positivity or denying reality. It’s about choosing which reality you’ll focus on. As Zig Ziglar famously said, “Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.”

Practical Application: The Perception Audit

Try this exercise for the next seven days:

Morning Perception Setting: Before checking your phone, spend five minutes consciously choosing how you’ll perceive the day ahead. What opportunities exist? What can you be grateful for?
Challenge Reframing: When obstacles arise (and they will), immediately ask: “What’s the opportunity hidden in this situation? What can this teach me?”
Evening Reflection: Before bed, review your day. Where did your perception serve you? Where did it limit you?

Remember John Maxwell’s wisdom: “Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.” Your perception determines which path you take.

Discipline #3: Get Clear on the “I” to Embrace the “We”—The Paradox of True Confidence

The Principle: Genuine self-confidence isn’t about you—it’s about what you can contribute.

Self-confidence is perhaps the most misunderstood concept in personal development. We’ve been sold a distorted version that equates confidence with self-promotion, constant self-reference, and an inflated sense of importance.

That’s not confidence. That’s insecurity wearing a mask.

The True Nature of Self-Confidence

Real self-confidence is a progressive appreciation and understanding of yourself so that you can nobly serve causes and others. Read that again. The purpose of understanding yourself isn’t to become more self-absorbed—it’s to become more effective in service.

Think of it this way: a surgeon must have absolute confidence in their skills, knowledge, and abilities. But that confidence isn’t for their ego—it’s for their patient’s survival. Their self-assurance enables them to serve at the highest level.

Brian Tracy teaches that “successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others.” But you cannot effectively help others if you don’t understand your own strengths, values, and unique contributions. You cannot give what you don’t possess.

The Isolation of Excessive Self-Focus

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: there’s little in this world more exhausting than being around someone who constantly talks about themselves. Excessive self-focus doesn’t attract people—it repels them. It creates conflict, breeds contention, and ultimately results in isolation and loneliness.

Jim Rohn observed, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” But if your self-absorption drives people away, who are you left averaging with?

The Power of “We”

When you achieve clarity about your intrinsic worth—not based on external validation but on genuine self-understanding—something remarkable happens: you become more open-minded and able to perceive and appreciate the intrinsic greatness in others.

This is the paradox: the more secure you are in yourself, the less you need to talk about yourself. The more you understand your value, the more you can recognize value in others. True self-confidence creates space for others to shine.

Harmonious Synergy: 1+1=11

When individuals who are clear on their “I” come together in genuine collaboration, they don’t just add their contributions—they multiply them. This is what I call harmonious synergy, and it’s where extraordinary results are born.

Consider the greatest achievements in human history: none were solo endeavors. From the moon landing to medical breakthroughs to business empires—they all required people who were confident enough in themselves to embrace the “we.”

Practical Steps to Balance “I” and “We”:

Daily Self-Inventory: Spend 10 minutes each morning identifying your unique strengths and how you can deploy them in service today.
Practice Active Appreciation: In every interaction, consciously look for something valuable in the other person. Acknowledge it genuinely.
Shift Your Language: Notice how often you use “I” versus “we” in conversations. Aim for balance, leaning toward “we” when discussing achievements.
Seek Collaborative Opportunities: Actively look for situations where your strengths can complement others’ strengths.

As Tony Robbins says, “The secret to living is giving.” But you can only give from a place of fullness, not emptiness. Get clear on your “I” so you can powerfully embrace the “we.”

The Path Forward: From Knowledge to Transformation

These three disciplines—majoring in the majors, mastering your perception, and balancing self-confidence with collaboration—weren’t taught in any classroom I attended. Yet they’ve been more valuable than most of what was.

The question isn’t whether these principles are true. The question is: will you apply them?

Knowledge without application is merely entertainment. As Darren Hardy reminds us, “The biggest gap in the world is the gap between knowing and doing.” Don’t let these insights become another set of good ideas you never implement.

Start today. Choose one discipline and commit to practicing it for the next 30 days. Notice what changes. Document your progress. Adjust your approach. Then add the next discipline.

Remember Les Brown’s powerful declaration: “You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.”

Your formal education gave you a foundation. Now it’s time to build the life you were meant to live—one simple, powerful discipline at a time.

4regalliving.com